Monday, July 20, 2009

We Love Our Bedroom

Our new ward is so EARLY. 8 am. Which means we are done by 11 am. Which means that yesterday we took a 2 hour nap. And it was glorious. We stay up too late all the time. I consider myself an any-time-of-day person, but I used to think I was as far from a morning person as possible. Then I met my husband:

Scary, huh? Last night we watched the movie Paris, je t'aime. And it is a good one. I've wanted to see it for a long time, but before I met Andrew, many of my friends did not exactly sidle onto my independent movie tastes. Which never bothered me. But now that I have an eternal companion (yes, I just dropped the EC line) who loves to watch them with me, I get to watch them. And as a result, I watch more and more off beat movies. And this one was fabulous. Except for one skit, which led to this picture.

Frodo (aka Elijah Wood) falls in love with a vampire. And the vampire falls in love with him. She turns him into a vampire so they can be together. The transformation takes seconds. When he awakens, he bites her on the neck. Which is, as I have learned from this scary short, how vampires make out.


The director to this creepy love scene was wrong. False advertising. That is not how vampires kiss. Nor is it how vampires transform. I know this short was made about three years before the ever-loving Twilight movie came out, but seriously. Why didn't he ask Stephanie Meyer? This is how vampires kiss. They kiss out of love. Not out of lust or weirdness. Furthermore, they kiss on the lips. Not on the neck at the same time. And as I just stated, it is NOT how vampires transform. He barely looked like he was in pain. Everyone- and I mean everyone- knows that vampires are not created in mere seconds, or minutes for that matter. They take Three. Whole. Days.

And might I add, vampires are not creepy. They are lovers. Never creepy. Edward never creeps on Bella. Why? Because she likes it. Thus, his creepage is no longer creepy. The vampire in this short drank people's blood. As all ever-loving Twilight fans know, good vampires do not drink human blood. They are vegetarians. And they are so dreamy. Nor do they fly. They RUN.

The director got vampires so wrong.
Don't believe me? Go to Then you will learn a thing or two.

P.S. Soon a new movie in the same fashion will be out. It's called New York, I Love You. I'm excited to see it. And I'm even more excited to find out what the next City to fall in love with will be. I'm guessing... Sydney. Because it has two syllables.